Foreward by Clark S.
Reed, M.Div., TSTA
Teaching and Supervising Transactional Analyst
It is a daunting task for me to write just a few lines
for Greg’s new work about ‘drama’ with the elephant in
the room (Eric Berne) being ever present because the
author shifts the emphasis from ‘games’ to ‘drama’ and
makes the focal point ‘the drama triangle,’ which Steve
Karpman is purported to have sketched at an NFL football
game years ago.
I like this shift as for me it makes increasing
awareness of ‘faces’ (a word which Greg uses) simple and
understandable. I personally wish he had not used Bern’s
classical games such as ‘Why don’t you….Yes But.’ etc.
to introduce his theory; I was distracted unnecessarily.
Having said the above, in addition to re-awakening
interest in viewing these painful, predictable sequences
in a simple geometric figure (a triangle) I find Greg’s
subsequent six chapters making an important contribution
to the body of knowledge: by defining intimacy in a
creative way as being hopeful and profound; by giving
specific useful examples of how to transact to avoid
drama (Living in a Drama Free Zone); sharing the trio of
behaviors to eliminate for a drama free life (stop
discounting, make clear contracts, and ask for what we
want in a clear understandable way); a summary section
in each chapter that makes review easy and
understandable; and positing in his final chapter where
living a drama free life eventuates in a special calm
The alternative to drama according to Greg is intimacy.
His definition: Intimacy is the capacity to relate to
another person in an honest emotionally open equal and
caring way that includes transparency, vulnerability and
reciprocity. I believe Greg has a point here. Intimacy
is the only way to structure time that makes a drama
free life desirable.
Some theorists in the past have doubted that it could be
achieved. This is an important point Greg is proposing
and makes the read important if it were the only point.
There are more important points however.
Gregory`s final chapter, A Dramatic Finish portrays
importantly how the outcome of getting unhooked from the
‘addiction’ to drama (my term) provides the opportunity
to develop skills and ability to choose a calm peaceful
ending that is beautiful and victorious. His question,
‘How do you want to live in your final days as a human?’
resonates with me and his invitation to take 100%
responsibility for how you live every moment is the
necessary prescribed elixir.
Thank you Gregory.